thanks for your work, @dra_nancyviana .
I think his story presents two Conflicts that make him connect with his audience. The first, her personal and professional achievements, despite having been a mother at 18. The second, his insecurity when facing his first year of work without the help of his mentors. I also think the visual metaphor he uses in his last paragraph is a hit: scuba diving and the iceberg.
To enhance the connection capacity of your story, I encourage you to better visualize your two conflicts (think of two key images and help us visualize them). I also invite you to use the allegory of diving from the beginning of the text, as a way to increase its coherence and memorability, through successive related metaphors (diving, missing air, immersing yourself in knowledge as a way of acquiring individual power, disorientation, tides , currents, beaches, etc.).
Good luck!
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displayname2210340
It came to me and I could "see you", I think it is important that you can describe so that others can "see" us
Congratulations
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displayname1133145
Prowadzący Plusthanks for your work, @dra_nancyviana .
I think his story presents two Conflicts that make him connect with his audience. The first, her personal and professional achievements, despite having been a mother at 18. The second, his insecurity when facing his first year of work without the help of his mentors. I also think the visual metaphor he uses in his last paragraph is a hit: scuba diving and the iceberg.
To enhance the connection capacity of your story, I encourage you to better visualize your two conflicts (think of two key images and help us visualize them). I also invite you to use the allegory of diving from the beginning of the text, as a way to increase its coherence and memorability, through successive related metaphors (diving, missing air, immersing yourself in knowledge as a way of acquiring individual power, disorientation, tides , currents, beaches, etc.).
Good luck!
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displayname2245723
@lembergier_1 thank you very much
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@antonionunezstorytelling
Thank you very much, I will welcome your recommendation and I will share them later,
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